Snow White would be ashamed of these Dwarves...
No matter how many famous friends they try and rope in, nor how many fights with other famous non-friends they like to have, The Dwarves suck. Sorry the criticism doesn't get any better than that, but this a band that have absolutely no redeeming qualities in this sorry excuse for a record. 'The Dwarves Must Die'? You'd be hard pushed to disagree with that. The Dwarves would love to try and convince you that they are a worthy band, of any description. But don't believe the hype.
In between alleged beatings by former associate and Queens Of The Stone Age frontman Josh Homme, Blag Dahlia and his assorted miscreant bandmates have created a record of no musical value or interest. With the tackiest artwork (a dwarf – natch – and naked ladies, a wooden cross and some shower scenes) since the last GWAR album, bad taste is a concept The Dwarves seem to have taken to heart and treasure.
A hotch-potch of random styles and genres, with no discerning consistency or form to it, smacking your head into a brick wall would be preferable to listening to garbled nonsense like the 'music' on this record. With about as much credibility and talent as Fred Durst and Limp Bizkit, eating glass is another tempting alternative to past the time. Whilst the band members are obviously certifiable, the mental stability of the people they've convinced to appear on this record needs to be examined. Nick Oliveri (a former full-time Dwarf), Josh Fresse (freelance drummer extraordinaire) and other random types from Urge Overkill and Me First & The Gimme Gimmes, all need their heads checked- pronto.
You have to wonder what a big-name producer like Eric Valentine (Good Charlotte, Lostprophets) is doing working on a record like this. When songs such as 'Salt Water City' (featuring The Offspring's Dexter Holland) begin, you have to wonder if this whole thing is one seriously unfunny joke. This is like the musical equivalent of WWE and I think it can be agreed that it is something we could all do without.