Dark cloud provides silver lining...
Incubus are a good band, or at least they used to be – I don’t think I’ll meet with too many disagreements there. Now, whilst it might seem strange to open a review with a comment about a (seemingly) unrelated band, there is method in my madness, and via a highly tenuous and unimpressively short chain of questionable logic, I will explain what possible relevance Incubus have to Three Days Grace’s new album. You see there is another band that plays similarly funky sun-kissed rock that go by the name of Hoobastank, who are little more than a poor-man’s Incubus. Don’t worry, I’ll be getting to the point shortly. You see TDG have just won the loser’s lottery by landing themselves a support slot on these Incubus clones’ forthcoming European tour (which includes 6 dates in the UK – lucky us), thus begging the question – are TDG the poor-man’s Hoobastank? I for one can’t imagine how much debt the man in question would have to be in; we’re talking uber-poor here, but when you look at the appalling plethora of M.O.R. dross that TDG have toured with in the past – Puddle Of Mudd, 3 Doors Down and Evanescence; it doesn’t look good [Hey! 3 Doors down are a good band!-ed].
Well in answer to the question that should now be forming on your lips – there is good news and bad news. I’m not going to ask which you’d rather have first (I’m not here to pander to the likes of you, fool), so it’s the good news then: TDG are not a poor-man’s Hoobastank. That’s a relief, but only a momentary one I’m afraid, because the bad news is that they’re dangerously close to being a poor-man’s Nickleback. The very thought of such a thing makes me feel dirty, but this is the kind of filth that a shower just isn’t going to cleanse, no matter how much soap you use. No, not even if it’s got those exfoliating bits in. Where at least Hoobastank started off with a winning formula, TDG have taken everything that’s bad about Americanised rock – boring and predictable pseudo-metal riffage and a non-descript vocal delivery; and passed it through the machine labelled ‘sanitise’. The best way I could describe them (in a way that avoids me having to use the ‘N’ word again) is that they’re like Finger Eleven would be, if you took away every last shred of song-writing ability. Oh dreary me. They even have the audacity to state their influences as Tool, Jeff Buckley, Nine Inch Nails and Led Zeppelin! Just because I listen to Hella doesn’t make me a guitar virtuoso – if only it was that easy…
The one positive thing that can be taken from this album is that it should make people re-evaluate how healthy the UK rock scene is at the moment. This is because TDG have recently been nominated for three ‘highly influential’ (not over here sonny-Jim) Radio Music Awards, including ‘Artist of the Year’ and ‘Song of the Year’ – imagine how bad the rest of the field must be if toss like this gets nominated for 2 of the most important categories? I tell you, we don’t know how good we’ve got it.
Not sure it’s enough to ever make me appreciate McFly though…